19 Months

Sweet Emma Love is 19 months old, growing up so fast!  Her comprehension and retention of new knowledge is amazing to me!  I'm sure every mom feels that way about their child/children though.  She finally has becoming interested in climbing things but still prefers to be tossed through the air onto the bed and the couches.  She also learned how to open the doors in the house, not the front door or sliding door, but all the inside doors, yikes! Now, if I shower while she is up, I have to make sure she remains in the bathroom by talking to her so she cant get in to too much trouble... lol

I love that she is learning how to be polite and knows that some words are not supposed to be said.  The other day I accidentally let slip; "what the hell?" and she turned to me, shocked and said; "heck. What the heck!"  correcting me.  It was awesome and was also another reminder to watch what I say around her... She says; "please" "thank you" and "you're welcome" now, at the appropriate moments without much prompting, and is learning to say; "excuse me."  She is so sweet and has a great heart.

That's not to say she does not have her "toddler" moments.  She has plenty of those, although they do not last long most of the time.  She throws fits when she does not get her way, fights diaper changes like they are torture, and becomes frustrated when learning a new skill.  All of which is normal, and all of which we are all learning to handle in a calm and loving manner.  Not always easy, as any parent knows. But, no matter how tough, frustrating, or tiring things get, it is all so very worth it!

That being said, it is sometimes difficult to admit when days are tough. I always feel so guilty if I have a bad moment, due to the fact that we prayed so long to be parents and I feel I am not allowed to have those.  And there seems to be this idea some "normal" parents have (I stress some, not all) that, those that adopt are somehow supposed to be superhuman and never feel tired, frustrated, worn out, or in need of a break. The reason I was given the other day by some co-worker was - "you wanted your child soooo much, you are not allowed to say you are tired, worn out or anything like that." As if somehow, because your child was wanted and adopted, parenting is magically all sunshine and flowers, rainbows and smiles. Well, guess what, adoptive parents are still human, adopted children are still human too. We go through the same things, all the toughness, tiredness, frustration, and joys as "normal" parents, because, we are HUMAN and very NORMAL!

Them saying that made me feel isolated and alone.  Until I remembered that, I am allowed to be tired, worn out, frustrated, and in need of a break. Because I am a real, normal, parent, and ALL parents have those moments.  I also know that my moments of pure joy, pride, gratitude, happiness, and sweet innocent love, far surpass even my roughest parenting days, and I would not change any of this amazing motherhood journey for any thing in the world!